Hi and welcome! I’m Isabella. I’m an artist, an erotic scriptwriter, poet, a recording artist, and I do sound editing too! I’ve been creating recordings like these since 2003. My voice has changed a lot over the years. The first Jackpot recording was made in 2007. Believe me when I say, collecting my recordings also means growing old with me! I recognize many of you from over a decade ago! Thank you for your loyalty. My birthday is October 31, 1980, and I was born in California and currently live in Kennewick, Washington. Sometimes I go to college in Pasco. I’m growing my hair out long and natural, and I usually wear makeup in and outside of the house.
I’m American, Christian, wife, mom, sister, painter, sketch artist, writer, citizen scientist, maker/engineer, vocabulary list collector, in-the-car singer, fabric designer, and project juggler. I’m good with needle and thread, and I’m getting better with a saw, a soldering iron, piano, and pre-calculus. I also love to cook and feed people yummy cuisine! I write all of my recordings by hand first. In ink. Then I record them aloud. Then I edit them with sound software with focus on filtering, mastering, cutting out unwanted sounds for the perfect sound.
My husband, Michael, manages this store for me and handles the design, tech support, web development, and nearly all customer questions. He is basically my tech slave, and sometimes he speaks on my behalf, because I trust him and we communicate all day long. We live and work together, so he sometimes arranges things on my behalf or transcribes my words on email while I speak. He also insulates me from having to read emails that I wish I could unread. If you want me to read your letter, he will only give it to me if you are respectful, kind, complimentary, worshipful, appreciative and/or engaging my mind in a way he thinks I will find interesting. I trained him to do this, so don’t get mad at him! He spends a lot of time maintaining, upgrading, securing, and adding more of my content to this site. It would mean a lot to me if you treated him with the same kindness you show me. He reads the support tickets and responds to them, and I can’t imagine going forward in my life without him. If you talk to him, feel free to convince him to massage me after he helps you!
I strive to live authentically and with purpose. Admittedly, I feel weird writing about myself right now. I feel that anything I say will be barely scratching the surface to who I am.
I love mathematics, neurology, astrophysics, astrophotography, engineering, and working with touch sensors. I live in Tri-Cities, WA, which is near the Hanford development (where the world’s first nuclear bomb was created and where LIGO discovered gravitational waves). Every day I secretly hope to meet someone who will introduce me to interesting things I haven’t learned or discovered yet. I love learning and applying knowledge in useful, creative ways. I want to sing higher notes longer, learn more piano chords, and paint murals on other people’s walls. I pray to see the day where my brother says my name and holds a conversation with me (he had a drowning accident with a traumatic brain injury). I’m constantly trying to come up with ways to assist him using technology, and I like tinkering with technology to make new toys! Math interests me very much, and I love learning more and more math. And I mean everything about math, especially the square root of two and imaginary numbers. That kind of stuff — the irrational numbers — plus quadratic equations and permutations — they all fascinate me! I am one algebra class away from pre-calculus. I earned a final average of 104 in my last algebra class. My goal before I die is to contribute a new math discovery and earn a PhD in Mathematics. It will take a lifetime but I’m determined.
Enough about math! Two plus two equals obey me now. I create recordings that focus on convincing you to love me, give me your money, and fall in love with me, just like you would on a stripper who has rent due tomorrow. Instead of giving you lap dances, I give you audio trances (listen with your headphones)! While you become addicted to me, and obviously you love it, I drain your wallet soooo good. You orgasm (sometimes with no hands!) and keep coming back for more!
Oh, you’re still here? You want more? You must be in love with me. Keep reading.
Isabella Valentine’s Wishlist – The most common way to “greet” me online is to send me a present! Even if we don’t talk at all, it’s one of my favorite ways to interact with people. The surest way to make me happy is to send me gifts! Pay me whenever you think about me. Think about me often. Love me forever. The fastest way to get me to smile is to send a gift as a complete, unexpected surprise! You can never go wrong buying Isabella a gift. If sending through Amazon, have it gift wrapped with a notecard that says: “The Siren Made Me Do it.”
Like I say in my recordings, “If it doesn’t hurt, you’re not giving enough!”
I also have an Instagram account:
@isabellavalentine – This is where I post my art (drawings, paintings, inventions, creative projects) and family friendly pictures. I do not generally talk about or post explicit content, nor will I respond to lewd comments.
SEND A GIFT CARD TO ISABELLA!
Add my recipient email to any gift card site: email@example.com
Etsy (Recommended: $10-1000. This will win me over every time. I want to own more items that aren’t mass produced.)
Adafruit (Any amount is good! I love this place! It will look perfect on your credit card statement too, engineers.)
RoseGal (Recommended: $50-250. My newest obsession. If you love me, just dive in and spoil me with something from here!)
Eshakti (A minimum of $100 please so I can buy a dress with shipping! There are soooo many dresses I want! How to choose??)
Pinup Girl Clothing ($250 minimum please. If you visit the site, look at the prices of the most expensive dresses. Those are usually the ones I wear. They often end up on my recording covers!)
Of course, not all gifts involve money. Some of the finest gifts I’ve ever received weren’t financial at all and changed my life. Gifts involving talents, skills, resources, invitations, collaborations, favors, opportunities, and connections are incredibly appreciated and valued. I’m a giver too 🙂
God bless! Namaste and aloha!